Kevin Marshall's America
Jimmy Kimmel has declared December 17th “National UnFriend Day.”
Kimmel, whose greatest moment as a talk show host came as a minor footnote in the Leno/Conan/NBC drama earlier this year, decided to promote the event after observing what he viewed as the “cheapening” of friendship on Facebook.
From the Press Release (no, seriously):
“Friendship is a sacred thing, and I believe Facebook is cheapening it,” Kimmel said in his announcement. “I go on this Facebook, I see people with thousands of what they call ‘friends’—which is impossible. You can’t have a thousand friends. A friend is someone you have a special relationship with, not someone who asks ‘which Harry Potter character are you?’ Remember five years ago when nobody was on Facebook and you didn’t know what the guy you took high school biology with was having for lunch? Remember how that was totally fine? Let’s go back to that.”
Because the problem, you see, is that people don’t understand the difference between Facebook and reality anymore. People don’t even know what friendship is! And they don’t know what’s real! You see it every day. People who should be your friends just come up to you and ask me to plant crops for them, or they just say a sentence or two out of context and then walk away, or they simply give you a thumbs up and say “I like this.”
…
Guys, this is monumentally stupid on a number of levels, and it’s guaranteed to create unnecessary drama.
You know those people whose statuses you hide on Facebook because they’re so annoyingly over-the-top you can barely stand to read them? Imagine their reaction when you actually defriend on the day when drama llamas are on the lookout for people unfriending them.
There’s going to be pandemonium. People will pick up the phone and call others for the first time, using Facebook’s invasive lack of privacy, and chew them out. Facebook statuses will be written along the lines of “well, I guess you find out the hard way who your real friends are” and “thanks a lot to those of you who actually care” and other passive-aggressive nonsense.
Worst of all, I’ll have to read it!
So listen. Instead of engaging in Kimmel’s desperate grab for attention, just ignore people who annoy you. How do you do that? Highlight their status and click on the “X” that appears on the upper right-hand corner. It’ll then give you the option to hide them from your friend feed.
Boom, done. Problem solved.
Besides, Kimmel used Shatner to make the announcement on his show, and that guy hasn’t made a good decision in forty years.
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25 Responses to November 17th is Create Unnecessary Drama Day!
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STALK ME
See, this is exactly why I limit my Facebook friends list to a maximum of 150 people. This way, I ensure that I don’t have people on my FB list that I really don’t know anything about or even care to know anything about. Plain and simple.
Although I suspect that there might be some openings for future friends after November 17th, especially when about 20 or 30 of my “friends” get sick of me and dump me like yesterday’s garbage. :)
This is very true. There are people who I do not like and do not enjoy associating with. And when they defriended me on Facebook, I was hurt, upset and planning revenge…literally…planning revenge like they actually did something real to me which, of course, they did not.
There is no need to defriend anyone on facebook. Hiding them from the news feed serves the same purpose with no drama.
However, I am going to have you to easy up on Kimmel. The man who helped bring us ‘Girls jumping on Trampolines’ still has a lot of cred to use up.
“Remember five years ago when nobody was on Facebook and you didn’t know what the guy you took high school biology with was having for lunch? Remember how that was totally fine? Let’s go back to that.”
Count me in. But it’s not just about doing it to be a jerk, you’re giving people you don’t know access to a lot of information about your life. Why? It’s not just your a/s/l, birthday, and other information you post up- it’s also what people write on your wall, the pics they tag you in, etc. Everyone on my friend list, even real friends, is on restricted viewing to my profile.
But I do X almost everybody out of my newsfeed.
People take Facebook way too seriously.
Count me in too! I have been weeding out friends. You don’t realize that everyone on that list sees your status. I have Murrayisms..sayings from my family that I and others joke about. I had another mom come up to me using one of the terms. I was way too weirded out. Then if you have a party, you can’t mention it because you can’t invite everyone. It is too much drama for me. So I actually keep mine under 50.
If they could just find a way to combine ‘Unfriend Day’ with ‘Talk like a Pirate Day'; it would make the passive aggressive nonesense that still gets through that much more enjoyable.
Unfriending someone on facebook (which I do usually because I realize how worthless they are as a human being)is far less dramatic than the real-life alternative…slapping them in the face and telling them I wish their mother had had an abortion.
Oh this sounds like a totally great idea!!!! I hate Facebook. I don’t want to know what everyone is doing right now or what they have to say about DWTS. Prior to Facebook, my friends actually had interesting things to say in emails. Now it’s just getting “beads” and stupid stuff. I won’t unfriend anyone only because I never go to Facebook, so it would be exceptionally mean for me to go on just to unfriend people.
I can’t ignore annoying people, as Kevin suggests because they are all over the place! Work, on the roads, on the radio, tv, cell phone talkers, etc. Let’s face it, most people are annoying and most people are on Facebook.
Jen (#4)…EXACTLY!
Why are you looking ahead on your special-edition Kevin Marshall desktop calendar? Doesn’t every day have the same label?
HAR HAR HAR HAR HAR
Is that a Tuesday? I think this would only work on a Tuesday morning.
Facebook taught me there is a signficant number of people that I was happy to know are still alive… and that was all I really wanted to know about them.
I think it’s really funny how many people complain about it, but like they can’t look away!!
It’s really easy though, all you need to do is shut off the computer and go do something else.
HA! Exactly.
What is the point of having them as friends on facebook, if you hide them from your friend feed?
Why not just delete them as a friend if you don’t actually associate with them?
Likely they will not call you or even know you deleted them as a friend, I don’t think FB lets you know when a friend deletes you.
Craig B. – They’ll know. Trust me, they’ll know. Drama Llamas are built in with a sense that alerts them to the absence of your activity on Facebook.
Jimmy Kimmel is an actual adult? An adult who thinks defriending friends is an ideal way to say to your “true” friends, “Hey, your really special to me!”. Why didn’t Hallmark think that one up? To bad his biggest followers will probably consist of tweens, teenagers, and young adults. I shudder to think what they will do with it,some poor kid will suffer. Laugh it up MORONS!
Kevin works in the theatre, so he is an expert on Drama Llamas first hand.
M.L. - Past tense, but yes. Exactly.
Really, Kevin?–you’ve gone so far as to attack the career judgement of Captain James T. Kirk’s alter ego? This cannot be interpreted as anything other than a grevious offense; bordering on sy-fy blasphemy.
For the sake of your obviously clouded soul, please make a reasonably convincing “Act of Contrition” and fervently say twelve “Live-long-and-prospers.”
Now, go, my son, and spin no more.
Dear World of Facebook users:
Please learn how to use the (amazingly precise) privacy settings on your profile and quit complaining about the LACK OF PRIVACY. If it exists- it’s your fault. If you need a lesson on how to fix it, let me know. My taking time to teach you would be better than your bellyaching.
Thank You,
Unreasonably aggressive response girl
Where is the “like” button on your blog page?
I’m alreday on this. Please don’t insult Shatner again. Imagine what pop culture would be like without him.
Oh this is great, an actual reason (excuse) to defriend those unwanted ‘friends’ that you didn’t have the heart to turn away the first time. Happy November 17th!